Baby Scissorhands

Someone please explain to me the scientific principle by which sweet precious chubby little baby hands suddenly transform into violent weapons. My baby just turned five months old, and already I have had to start wearing contacts because he keeps pulling my glasses off my face. And forget wearing my hair down, because when he gets a fistful and pulls… OW!  But what amazes (and terrifies) me most of all is the fingernails. Seriously, people, I have to cut them every single day. Otherwise, this beautiful little hand…

Beautiful Baby Hand

… manages to slice and dice me like a santoku knife!

Inevitably, if I forget to cut his nails, my husband or I will end up injured. And the thing is, every single time, I forget to be scared. I look at that angelic little face…

Angel Baby

And I just have to hold him.

Mommy Reaching Out for Baby

As I reach out for him, I remember…

He is Baby Scissorhands.

Baby Scissorhands

I start having flashbacks. Those hands. Those beautiful chubby hands. The nails. My face.

Second Thoughts

He’s coming at me so fast, I can’t think. Mommyyyyy…

Regular Hand

Scissorhand

No, wait!

Second Thoughts

Bigger Regular Hand

Bigger Scissorhand

But it’s too late.

Baby Scissorhands Getting Closer

Augggghhhh!!!!!!!!!

Face all cut up

What? Who, me?

Baby Scissorhands with BloodI give the baby back to my husband and go upstairs to dress my wounds. Oh, and to get the nail clippers.

Advertisements
This entry was posted in children, laugh, parenting, sketches. Bookmark the permalink.

9 Responses to Baby Scissorhands

  1. The Borg says:

    LOL… “Aww, his hands are so soft and cudd…..aaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!”

  2. Hahaha, it's so true! I wear glasses too, and the daycare I work at has a lot of babies that are ALWAYS pulling my glasses off!

  3. merf says:

    Look out! It's an illusion! They are not as cuddly as they loooooooooooooook……………

  4. merf says:

    It's amazing how fast they can do it, too. Before you even realize what happened!

  5. Kristina says:

    I'm busting out laughing-this post was hilarious-those pics!!!!!!

  6. Hilarious post! And that chubby little hand is so cute!

    Glad I could be an encouragement to your running! In the interest of full disclosure – it took me a long time to go from 1-2 miles to full marathons (and not everyone HAS to run a marathon). But I can remember running 5ks and being adequately challenged at that distance for several years before I tried my first 10k. Then several years later I trained for my first half marathon, and so on…

    C25k is a great program! I predict you'll be hooked after a race or two!

  7. merf says:

    The hand is cute, but don't be deceived…

  8. merf says:

    Hahahah, thanks Kristina! Thanks for visiting my blog!

  9. Colleen says:

    Hi there,
    Thanks for stopping by!! (and for your sweet comments!). I see you are a working mom – as am I. Always nice to see as I sometimes feel like there aren't many of us who work and blog!! Enjoy your little one and I so get this post. I trim my kids nearly every time I bath them. (and watch out for the contacts, they still get you!)

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s